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Turbulence

"Turbulence"

Published On : 2023-01-02
Posted by : Pari Adhikari
Category : Experiences
Category : Adolescent Girls
Category : Health and Development
Category : Young People
Category : Menstruation
Category : Concurrent issues
Category : Gender and advocacy

Supriya let out a loud sigh as she entered her apartment and latched the door behind her. She stood right at the door for a few moments, as if to gather herself together before turning on the lights.

On her usual days, Supriya would quickly freshen up, change into her pajamas and make herself something to eat. Today, however, was different. Supriya wasn’t feeling like herself at all. There was this weird uneasiness lingering all over her body.

Supriya headed straight to the kitchen and distractedly investigated the fridge. She had been craving something sweet the entire day but couldn’t figure out what exactly it was that she wanted. As she moved onto the kitchen counter, an opened packet of milk powder caught her attention. She grabbed a large spoon and pushed it slowly into its opening. A spoonful of milk powder slowly made its way out, leaving tiny white spots on the kitchen counter that contrasted the dark granite. She then tossed the entire heap into her wide-open mouth. To her dismay, however, her ravenous mouth only got a taste; the rest of it splashing onto her chin and snowing her velvet coat.

“Ughhh,” she cried and began swiftly dusting her face and coat.

Then, just as she tried to seal the packet again with a rubber band, on its last twist, the band broke. Now, instead of trying to find another one, Supriya broke down and started crying on the floor.

The fact that she couldn’t even carefully handle a spoon or tie an elastic made her sick to her stomach. She felt like there was nothing she could do right. She felt like an utter loser.

Just then, her little furry friend entered the scene. Unaware of the mess her human was then, Junu rushed into her arms to greet her.

Supriya found some solace at the sight of her dog, but this soon turned into additional self-loathing. She felt like a terrible owner. Junu definitely deserved someone who came home early and was excited to meet her. And how many more years did she have anyway? She was already 6 and had started looking crusty. The idea that Junu would not forever be by her side daunted Supriya. She couldn’t hold back her tears.

A few moments later, Supriya got up and started heating up the leftovers from earlier that day; she couldn’t leave her little Junu hungry. As she worked around the kitchen, she started reminiscing about her days back at home. Memories from her past soon started washing over Supriya like waves on a beach. She missed her mother the most; and the food, of course. She soon realized that her mother hadn’t called her today. It occurred to her that she must have been busy with her new neighbor. It was as if everyone was busy; busy without her. Flashbacks of her favorite coworker not waving back at her this morning were still haunting her and now it was her mother that was ignoring her. Nobody loved her. Nobody cared.

It had been a terrible day for Supriya. Or at least, so it seemed. And now, the only thing she wanted to do was disappear into thin air.

After feeding Junu and eating everything that she could get hold of, Supriya went to bed. The gloominess still lingered for a very long time.

The next morning, Surpriya woke up to some noise from the construction next door. The jitters were gone, but there was still this weird uneasiness around her lower abdomen. To add to that, she felt unusually bloated.

As she got up and started making her bed, she noticed a period stain on the sheets. The entire day earlier slowly started making sense. 


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